All posts tagged Hotels

  • Gulshada from Osh

    I arrived in Osh, a small city in Southern Kyrygzstan, in the evening. The light fell warmly on the unkempt buildings as my taxi driver whipped me around corners before finally depositing me in front of a grocery store and overcharging me a paltry dollar.

    The owner of the guesthouse I’d booked for that week came to pick me up there. She boasted several gold teeth and a friendly demeanor. The garden of her house, which had received wonderful reviews on Booking.com, smelled strongly of pig shit. I would later learn that it was also infested with cockroaches, and purposely left the bathroom lights on all night so that I wouldn’t see them scurrying out of the way as I marched towards the porcelain throne, my nocturnal bathroom journeys an unpleasant side-effect of eating Kyrgyz watermelon, apparently too early in the season.

    Gulshada’s husband, who spent most of his time working in the garden, spoke Russian with a strange accent. The night I arrived, Gulshada informed me that Osh was part of a traditional Uzbek kingdom and that, because of this, much of the population including her and her husband, was Uzbek. “Now there are fewer Uzbeks than before because there was some fighting between Uzbeks and Kyrgyz people a few years ago,” she said.

    I attributed Gulshada’s husband’s accent to an Uzbek linguistic influence and his slow speech to consideration for my own poor Russian. People in Osh seemed to have a generally tenuous grasp of Russian anyway; one woman at the bazaar didn’t even know her numbers in Russian, only in a language that sounded to me like funny Turkish (the language was definitely Kyrgyz or Uzbek, but I couldn’t tell which one.) So I thought little more of it until Gulshada showed up the next day to see how things were going. I was weighing my options about leaving because of the afore-mentioned cockroaches and pig shit smell, and wondering if it would be worth the hassle to find another hotel and get a refund. I mentioned the cockroaches to Gulshada, who shrugged and said, “They probably walked in from the garden. It’s warm, you know, the door is usually open.” Having not made a decision one way or the other about leaving, I changed the subject.

    “So how did you meet your husband?” I asked. “Oh, she said, “you know, he actually worked for me. And then of course, we fall in love and get married. He’s a good man and he loves my son, even though I had my son with my second husband. He even likes to pretend they look alike. But now he is kind of like a child because he has a brain tumour. Actually, that is why I started running guesthouses. Three years ago it was bad – he forgot everything, he even forgot his name. We took him to the hospital and they said, ‘It’s a brain tumour. There’s nothing we can do so take him home.’ In Kyrgyzstan the hospital system is very bad. So I brought him home and took care of him with natural remedies, and because of that I had to quit my job and I couldn’t work for three years. So because of that I started doing guesthouses. Now he is doing better. He can talk, he can work. But as you probably noticed, he is kind of like a child…”

    I felt a pang of curiosity about whether or not the diagnosis of a brain tumour was correct (is it possible for patients to make that kind of recovery in the event of a brain tumour? Or were the symptoms more consistent with those of a stroke?) This was immediately met with a pang of guilt, and I decided to stay for the remaining few days, pig shit smell and cockroaches or no. Meanwhile, Gulshada sat on the couch and answered her phone, chattering loudly as I sipped kvas and continued feeling slightly guilty about the fact that I come from a place with free socialized healthcare and relatively small number of cockroaches.

    Gulshada hung up.

    “That was my daughter,” she said. “She is feeling stressed out. Her husband is feeling frustrated at work.”

    “Oh,” I said.

    “They live in Bishkek,” Gulshada continued. “And because there are tensions between Uzbek and Kyrgyz people in this country, Uzbek people can get a job but it’s very difficult for them to advance at work. They have to work in low-level positions, because there is fear that if they get some power than something will happen.”

    “That sucks,” I said.

    “Yeah,” said Gulshada. “It’s tough to be Uzbek in Kyrgyzstan.”

  • You might not believe me if I told you this, but I’m not a spy.

    I’ve been asked if I am a spy a few times since I entered the post-Soviet world. It’s the fact that I’m a North American who speaks Russian that seems to inspire this question. Never mind that I don’t spend time with anybody who could be a remotely useful source of intelligence. The warning sensors start blinking as soon as a fully formed Russian sentence falls out of my mouth.

    Mostly when people ask they are half-joking. What would I say if I actually were a spy? “Oh snap, you caught me! I was just plying you with vodka so that later I could seduce you and ask you sensitive national-security-related questions during post-coital pillow talk, but you’ve totally blown my cover. More vodka?”

    Usually I say, “I could tell you, but then I’d have to kill you.” Then I laugh and tell them the truth – actually, I’m not a spy. I’m simply a North American who learned Russian because it’s difficult to communicate in the post-Soviet space without it.

    Yesterday I finally made it to Russia, crossing the border from Georgia to the Russian Caucasus en route to Vladikavkaz. I was expecting that there might be some trouble at the border because I have 12 Turkish stamps on my passport.

    If you haven’t been following the news, Russia and Turkey are locked in a war about whose president has a bigger penis. Turkey shot down a Russian jet, probably by mistake. Then Turkish president Erdogan didn’t apologize and claimed the plane was in Turkish airspace. In response, Russia imposed numerous economic sanctions against Turkey. The most important of these is that Russian travel agencies have been ordered to quit selling travel packages to Russians, and that Turkish citizens have been barred from travelling in Russia visa-free.

    This is horrible because it means that virile Turkish men have been denied their supply of foreign blonde women to hit on.

    On a more serious note, as Russia is one of Turkey’s main suppliers of tourists, this stupid contest is potentially devastating for the Turkish  tourism/hotel industry, and not that great for Russian travel agencies either.

    None of that has anything to do with me, but I wasn’t prepared to underestimate any possibility. I had money ready to pay a bribe if needed. I learned how to say that I thought Erdogan was compensating for his deficiencies below the belt in Russian.

    All in vain, as it turned out. I arrived at the Georgian border where the Georgian border officer quickly checked over my Russian visa and then wished me “good luck.” “Good luck?” I thought. “Am I going to need it?”

    A few minutes later, I was at the Russian passport window. “Zdrasvitse,” said the woman. “Zdrasvitse,” I said.

    It became clear almost immediately that she spoke no English, not even English directly related to her job. She took my passport, then started asking me questions in Russian. Where are you going? How long will you be in Russia? Is it your first time here?

    “Yes,” I said, in Russian. “It’s my first time.”

    “Well how do you know how to speak Russian then?” she asked. Then she picked up the phone. “We have somebody who is coming to Russia for the first time here,” she said into the receiver. “Please come quickly.”

    She motioned to the side of her office. “Wait there.”

    She still had my passport, so I waited obediently. It was a few degrees below zero; my breath hung in the air and my nose turned pink.  A crowd of other officials was standing two metres away from me. One of them looked at me incredulously and said, “Lady! What are you doing waiting there?!”

    “She told me to.”

    Finally, another official showed up. We exchanged zdrasvitses. He was baby-faced, maybe 21 or 22. He was also a few inches shorter than I. It was clear that he didn’t speak English either.

    “So where are you going?” he asked unsmilingly. “Right now, Vladikavkaz, and after that Moscow,” I said. “Who are you staying with?” “In Vladikavkaz, a hostel, but in Moscow, with a friend.” “What’s the friend’s name?”

    I didn’t know her last name, just had her first name, number and contact info. I showed him our Skype conversations.

    “Where did you learn Russian? Why do you know how to speak Russian?”

    I started to get frustrated, standing out there in the cold being asked stupid questions. “Well you little whippersnapper you,” I wanted to say, “you may not be aware that it is actually not easy to travel in the post-Soviet Union and not speak Russian. This situation is a case in point since you and the other 20 people working here don’t appear to speak any English at all. As you can clearly see from the stamps on my passport which you are holding, this is my fourth post-Soviet country. Doesn’t it stand to reason that it is NOT AT ALL WEIRD that I speak Russian?! Also, like nearly everybody else who has ever learned a second language in adulthood, I took classes with a teacher. What are you expecting me to say? ‘Oh hello, yes, I studied Russian in spy academy and as we all know, there is just so much going on in the dusty hamlet of Vladikavkaz that I just need to go there and spy on what’s going on.”’

    That’s not actually what I said. I explained again how I learned Russian, showed him the relevant passport stamps, and a few minutes later he appeared to give up and sent me on my way. It was, by far, the most bizarre and intense border crossing I have ever experienced.

    Later that night at the hostel, one of my hostel-mates asked me, “Kate, if it’s not a secret, how do you know how to speak Russian?”

    I said, “It’s not a secret. I’m a spy.” We all laughed.

    Here are some pictures of the spying I’ve been doing in Vladikavkaz.

    Vladikavkaz Train Station

    Boss, this is the Vladikavkaz train station. You might also want to know that trains leave and arrive from here, and that usually these trains are carrying people who speak Russian.

    Planet Lux

    Boss, should I ever need to stay in Vladikavkaz again, do you think you could set me up with a room in this hotel? It promises luxury, and I know it must be true because they’ve decided to write everything in Latin letters. I know I get to gather more information in hostels, but one night wouldn’t kill the spy budget, would it? C’mon. Hook a sister up.

    Vladikavkaz Cinema

    Although the Soviet Union was built on the ideas of a guy who said that religion was the opiate of the masses, cinema might actually be the opiate of Vladikavkazians. I think I also saw a strip club. Now you know, foreign governments. Now you know.

  • Turkish Travel Tips III: Save Money by Staying at a Turkish Budget Hotel

    For those who made it through my ode to the Turkish budget hotel and were left wanting more, here is my step-by-step guide to checking in at a Turkish budget hotel.

    Turkish Budget Hotel

    General Tips

    1. Do not reserve a hotel online in Turkey. Many budget hotels do not have websites. The ones that do will charge you inflated prices if you book online because they know that foreigners from North America and Western Europe are not used to bartering cultures and will happily pay the quoted price because it seems cheaper than the cost of hotels in their country. If you are worried that there may not be space in a given city (you are a large party, it is a holiday in Turkey, or it is high season in a popular area for tourists), try calling the hotel instead and bargaining over the phone. You are still likely to pay a higher price, but nothing like you would have paid using a site like Booking.com
    2. Ask to see the room before you pay. Often, lobbies will appear nicer than the rooms to coax visitors to shell out more cash. This strategy will also prevent them from sticking you in the worst room in the place, which is usually small and/or windowless. Checking the room is also a good way to gauge whether the hotel might secretly be a brothel.
    3. Breakfast is always included in Turkish hotels. If they try to charge you extra for breakfast, make an angry face and find another hotel. Note: This does not apply to campsites.
    4. In places that don’t see a lot of foreign tourists, hotels are cheaper. In Iznik or Konya, for example, what you can get for the same price is a lot better than in Istanbul or Izmir. Adjust your expectations accordingly.
    5. Test the internet before you decide to stay somewhere. Budget hotel internet connections can be iffy, but they don’t have to be. You can probably get a hotel for the same price with a good internet connection, so unless you are trying to go off the grid for a bit, I suggest finding a place where the internet works. Then you can show your friends your mad cockroach exterminating skills over Skype.

    Bargaining Tips

    1. To bargain most effectively I would suggest saying, “this is very expensive!” in Turkish. To do this, say, “Çok pahalɪ ya! (Choke pa-HAL-euh yah) as though you’re reproaching the hotel receptionist for suggesting you murder a baby. Then laugh coquettishly, as if his desire to get money out of you is roguishly charming.

    Seriously. It works like a charm.

    After this, see how low they’ll go before you quote a price, because if you quote one they might agree quickly, and you’ll have overpaid. After the lowest price they quote, quote a price 5 or 10 lira lower. You might get it, you might not, but it’s worth a try.

    1. Don’t ask for prices if there is another foreigner anywhere in the vicinity. Hotel staff know that it will look bad if you get a room for 50 lira while that clueless tourist from Texas paid 150 lira. Be discreet.
    2. Peek over the counter. Often, Turkish hotels have a register book that documents how much each guest is paying for his room. If you can manage to do it discreetly it’s a great, though perhaps slightly unethical, way to gauge a reasonable price for the hotel.
    3. You can negotiate a better price per night if you play to stay several nights at the same hotel. A hotel may be willing to give you a room for 50 lira for one night, 90 lira for two nights, 120 lira for three nights, and so on. If you’re staying in the same city for a while, this is a great way to bargain too. So for example, ask the price for one night. Once you’ve got that the lowest you can go, (for the sake of argument, we’ll say it’s 50 lira) then ask, “Okay, can I pay 120 lira for three nights?”

    What if I want to spend even less money?

    When I say “budget hotel” I am actually talking about mid-low range hotels. Bottom of the barrel hotels exist too, and can be worth it if you are really travelling on a shoe-string. You may, however, be forced to compromise in the areas of internet access, hot water, or air conditioning. Make sure you ask what is included in the price. If I weren’t a single woman travelling alone, I would definitely check some of these places out.

    But bargaining makes me uncomfortable!

    Too true! If, like me, you’re not from a bargaining culture, bargaining can be exhausting. I struggle with feelings of guilt because I am paying pennies for services that would be expensive back home.

    Sometimes you might not feel like it, and that’s okay. For spending a week in Istanbul, it’s not a huge deal. However, if you’re really on a budget or spending an extended period of time in Turkey, I recommend it. Do remember that purchasing power in Turkey is different; $25 will go a lot further than it will in Western Europe and North America.

    The other thing is, as one Turkish friend explained to me, in touristy areas demand from the wealthy (Western Europeans and Gulf Arabs) drives up the prices which locks Turkish people out of the market. So if you’re looking for a good reason to bargain, this is it.

    That being said, remember that it’s just money. If you overpay a few times it’s not the end of the world. While I’m never happy when I know that somebody is intentionally trying to get money out of me just by virtue of my nationality, I also think that generosity never goes out of style. Do your best to straddle the fine line between being a scrooge and being savvy.

    photo by:
  • Turkish Travel Stories: An Ode to the Turkish Budget Hotel

    Most travellers to Turkey will overspend when it comes to lodging, and for a long time I was one of them. But no longer, my friends! Through an unhappy accident, I discovered the Turkish budget hotel, and now I am joyously sleeping in less-than-clean cigarette-scented guest houses! This is my story.

    At the beginning of my first summer in Turkey, I was invited to stay with somebody that I’d met when I was there a few months before. Unfortunately, early into my stay, he got a phone call.

    “I’m so sorry,” he said. “That was my dream job calling. They want me for an interview tomorrow in Ankara. You can’t be here! I need to practice for my interview! I need to concentrate! I simply can’t blow it when I’m so close to achieving my dreams!”

    Rather than directing me to a hotel in the town where we were, he drove me to the bus station and said, “Go back to Izmir, take another bus to Basmane. There are lots of cheap hotels there. You can find something for around $25.”

    During the day, this probably wouldn’t have been a problem. However, by the time I got to Izmir, which was still strange and unknown territory at the time, it was already 10 p.m., and dark. I didn’t know where I was going, the family I was staying with was out of town, and I felt completely overwhelmed. Maybe my ex-friend’s directions were easy for a Turkish person to follow, and I think this was his assumption. But I was a foreign girl, alone, in the dark, in a strange city, and I didn’t speak Turkish yet.

    Then suddenly, like a mirage of a lush wadi in a scorching desert, a hotel appeared, complete with angelic music and all the other trappings of cartoon-like apparitions. Unfortunately, it looked expensive. A lot more expensive than $25. Confronted with the sudden choice between continuing on to Basmane and shelling out incredible amounts of cash to stay next to the bus station, I decided that the next best course of action was to burst into tears.

    “Why are you crying?” said the man next to me. I had to look down because he was only four and a half feet tall. “Are you okay? Did something happen. Do you need a place to stay? I’m flying out to London tomorrow morning, but I’m staying with my uncle and auntie tonight. If you’re in a bad spot, you could come and stay with us for a night. Don’t worry, I’m a good boy.”

    I did one of those hysterical laugh-sobs, because even if he hadn’t been a good boy, the fact that he was four and a half feet tall might have been a bit of an impediment to any rapey ambitions he might have had.

    I was pretty sure he wasn’t lying, and I was grateful. Unfortunately for him, I felt like being alone after the events of the day, and after a moment’s deliberation, I said, “Thank you very much – that’s so kind of you. I’m going to go to that hotel and ask them how much it costs, because I think I need to be alone right now.”

    I marched over to the hotel, walked into the lobby, and said, “How much does a room cost here?”

    The man behind the counter said, “150 lira.” ($75 American dollars, at the time.)

    Even this was a bit rich for my blood, so I heaved a sigh and made as if to blow that traveller-cheating popsicle stand and head to Basmane after all.

    The guy took a closer look at my puffy eyes, and said, “Ok. 100 lira.”

    What? Did the price just go down 50 lira?! That’s 25 dollars! And I hadn’t even been trying to bargain.

    100 lira was more like it. Even though I could probably have bargained more, I was exhausted and willing to spend the extra money to feel safe.

    “I’ll take it,” I said.

    Then I noticed a sign behind the counter. One night: 80 Euros ($120 USD)

    In that moment, I realized something. With the exception of large hotel chains like the Hilton, Turkish hotel owners actually just pull prices out of thin air based on how full the hotel is and what they guess travellers are willing to pay. This would not be the first time I witnessed this. Turkish hotels often post terribly inflated prices behind the counter in the hopes that unsuspecting tourists will just take a look and shell out their hard-earned cash.

    So here is the #1 rule of Turkish hotels for your personal edumification: You can bargain, and you should.

    Armed with my new knowledge, I took a bus to Basmane the next morning to find myself a cheaper place to stay.

    Eventually, I figured out about how nice a hotel that costs 25 dollars is supposed to be: not very nice. However, I have low standards for my hotels. They must be safe, they must have internet and air-conditioning, and they must not secretly be brothels.

    Mistakenly checking in to a brothel is a real concern. Signs include dirty sheets and televisions that only play porn.

    Unlike in Canada, in reputable Turkish hotels, you can’t simply bring a member of the opposite sex up to your room. If you try this, especially with a Turkish man, hotel staff will give him the stinky eye and block his way. This is a good clue that the hotel isn’t a brothel.

    Beware, however. Even if a budget hotel passes the not-a-brothel test, it may not be totally clean. In one hotel I stayed in, the toilet water was artfully garnished with a few cigarette butts. When I mentioned this to the man behind the front desk, he shrugged and said, “The cleaning lady must have forgotten them or something,” and went back to his work.

    At the beginning of my time in Turkey, I would have been bothered by this. By that point, however, Turkey had started to rub off on me, so I just laughed and went back upstairs. I only paid 22 dollars, and I got free breakfast with that. The next day, the same man asked me how I slept. I said, “the cockroaches were a nice touch.” He laughed, and so did I.

    Despite these gross details, I do recommend the Turkish budget hotel for budget travellers. They are not usually as sparklingly clean as hotels in Canada, but I don’t let it bother me unless it’s not even passably clean. You get a private room that you might not get at a hostel or couchsurfing, and sometimes it’s just nice to have a little time to regroup in your own (albeit temporary) space.

    Stay tuned next time for a step-by-step guide to checking into a Turkish budget hotel.